Signs you might need to get a real dog

Co-authored by The Flying Crane

The Flying Crane and I saw some adorable dogs on our way home yesterday and were discussing the fact that we just can’t own a dog while living in an apartment complex. This makes us very sad. But, we mused, at least we hadn’t gone out and gotten one of those tiny, yappy, can’t-be-for-real dogs. As a service to our community, we decided to come up with a list of signs that you might need to get a real dog:

If you regularly keep him in your purse, you might need to get a real dog.

If he has to be watered in the summer to prevent fainting, you might need to get a real dog.

If he has to wear a sweater to go outside in the winter, you might need to get a real dog.

If you have to carry him the last block of his walk, you might need to get a real dog.

If the sound he makes can at all be classified as a ‘yap’, you might need to get a real dog.

If a stair totally defeats him, you might need to get a real dog.

And finally, if he gets his nails done more often than Paris Hilton, you might need to get a real dog.

This is not by any means a complete list but I feel I’ve probably made tiny dog owners mad enough for one day…

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About The 1st Draft

I am a 20-something writer living in (okay, near) DC who loves politics, books, television, soccer, a good conversation, Cardinals baseball, and playing with my adorable nieces and nephews.
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